My heart has been broken. At least that’s what I was feeling at the time. I won’t go into the sordid details of how I got there. But I know I felt pain, sadness, and an overall sense of helplessness. I never felt like I could be whole again. I felt detached from the world and the people in it. I would have conversations, even laugh at times. I would attend events, go to work and even coach my clients. But deep down I felt broken. It seemed at times that I was just floating through life. An outsider looking at me never would have seen my internal anguish. I was good at pretending. In fact, I had mastered it.
I can’t pinpoint the exact moment when my change came. But one day I woke up & I said to myself…no more. This life that I’ve been given is a gift. It is a gift to breathe, to put my feet on the ground. It’s a gift to feel the earth beneath my toes. It’s a gift to touch with my hands. It’s a gift to taste. It is a gift to FEEL.
And that’s when it hit me. The sadness that I was experiencing was an emotion. As humans we try to deny ourselves experiencing emotion. As a woman, I often feel like I have to protect others from my emotions. I can’t get too heated or too sad. It seems that there’s always a balancing act. We think we have to be happy, be brave and courageous all the time. The truth is that in order to be whole we need to experience all levels of emotion. Understanding that our emotions are affected by environmental stimuli, hormones & psychological influences can help you cope with life’s emotional roller coaster. Some of these factors we can control, others we simply cannot.
In my experience, I’ve found the key to managing emotions is being self-aware. Personally, this is a skill set that I’m working on daily. Feel the feelings. Be angry, sad, discontent but don’t stay there. Break down the barriers that you feel are holding you captive. Take time to process your feelings. Get help. Journal what you’re feeling. Pray. Talk to a friend. Heck, talk to stranger!
Download a quick guide here on how you can help be more self-aware about your emotions.
The day I overcame my feelings of brokenness is the day that I realized I can feel something without being that thing. I can feel sad, but I am not sad. I can feel broken, but I am not broken. I can feel angry, I don’t have to live my life being angry.
On July 16, 2022 the United States federal government introduced a new mental health crisis number. It’s simple: 988. If you feel like you need a little extra help, there’s no shame…call them.
Share how you’ve productively dealt with your emotions. Your words may be just what someone else needs to empower them to take action on their journey of healing.